Dearest Slim Men, Women and Children
Before we get into the Slim Man Dance Routine, I need to be diligent and inform All Slim People about the upcoming stuff…a lot has been popping up!
Why don’t you pop into the Slim Store and take a stroll around? We got Slim Man CDs and the latest Bona Fide CD–perfect for your next road trip:
Tonight, Tuesday, April 7th, I’m doing the Vino with Dino Show at Three Sixty North, a Rat Pack restaurant in downtown Palm Springs, CA. I’ll be doing some Slim, some Frank and some Dino and…the legendary Carl Davis is gonna give dance lessons at 7 PM. For free. Seriously. So come on down, cut a rug, hoist a glass, and have a blast.
On Wednesday, April 8th, I’m doing an interview with talk show host Donna Whittington at 6 PM Pacific (9 PM EDT.) It’s gonna be broadcast live on YouTube. I’m not sure how all this works, but here’s the link:
Thursday night, April 9th, it’s the Vino with Dino Show at the Coolest Wine Bar in the West–La Rue Wine Bar in Old Town La Quinta, CA. It’s like a European café, with small plates, craft beers, and nice wines. And Lonesome Slim on the banjo!
Lots of greats Slim Shows coming up–all details down below.
And Now for All The New News From Slim’s Shady Trailer Park:
I was at a private party at 360 North a few weeks ago. Your Fearless Leader was hanging out with guitarist Peter White and some other fine folks when I was introduced to a guy named Carl Davis. The party was quite a shindig-it was hosted by Carl.
Carl in blue, Peter in green
I had lunch with Carl a few days later. Turns out…he’s a dance instructor. I went to his house, and he introduced me to his girlfriend. They asked me if I wanted to do a Vino with Dino Show at 360 North in downtown Palm Springs. Carl would give dance lessons before the show, and I’d do the Dino Show after.
I said yes. Yes I can. We’re starting tonight. Seriously.
Slim People! I’m a bit apprehensive about the dance lesson thing. I rarely dance. Sometimes after way too much wine I might get out on the dance floor and do the Funky Chicken. But I don’t normally wake up in the middle of the night and say…
“I got ants in my pants and I need to dance!”
Why? I really don’t know. I admire men who can dance. Michael Jackson. Gene Kelly. Bruno Mars. But I’ve just never had a burning, yearning desire to dance. I’ve never called up my Slim Pals at Slim’s Shady Trailer Park and said…”Hey Fellas! Let’s go out dancing!”
Most of my Manly Man friends won’t dance unless dragged, drugged or drunk. Sure, most of my Manly friends are knuckleheads-and I’d tell that to their faces if they were in front of me-but most of them aren’t big dancers. And you can include me in that group of knuckleheads
When I’m at a wedding, and a woman asks me to dance, I’ll try to get out of it…
“I just had my knee replaced and they put it on backwards.”
“My big toe got stuck in the bathtub faucet and it’s still swollen.”
I was doing the Vino with Dino Show last week at La Rue, and as I was singing, four attractive Slim Babes got up and started dancing…with themselves. One of them came over to me and said…
“We can’ get any men to dance!”
It’s not the first time I’ve heard that from women. I’ve heard it many times. Seriously.
Slim Men! It might be time to Man Up and put on the dancing shoes. Tonight at 360 North, Carl told me he’s teaching the jitterbug.
I asked Carl what kind of dance you’d do if you wanted to dance to Frank and Dean and Nat. He told me the fox trot.
I asked if he could teach the fox trot next week. If he does, I’m in. I’ve trotted before, but it’s usually to the bathroom in the middle of the night. I’ve never fox-trotted. But I might try.
I’ll keep ya posted, SlimNation.
Do Fearless Leaders dance? Did George Washington do the Boogaloo? Did Winston Churchill do the Humpty-Hump? Did Christopher Columbus do the Mambo Italiano?
I don’t know. The only time we dance here at Slim’s Shady Trailer Park is when someone accidentally steps barefoot on the burning embers of a campfire. And that kind of dancing is hard to teach.
But fun to watch.
Who loves ya?
We here at Slim’s Shady Trailer Park want to apologize in advance if we have offended any of the following:
Anyone who actually does get up in the middle of the night and scream “I got ants in my pants and I need to dance!”
Anyone who has had their knees replaced and put on backwards
Anyone who got their big toe stuck in a bathtub faucet
Anyone who trots to the bathroom in the middle of the night
Anyone who has accidentally stepped barefoot on the dying embers of a campfire
Anyone who has done a funny dance after stepping barefoot on the burning embers of a campfire
George Washington, Winston Churchill, and Christopher Columbus