Cement Botox and Blue Steel

Slimmest of All People, I just wanna thank you Slim Guys and Dolls for coming out to the Big Slim Show in Palm Springs last week. We had one hell of a hootenanny. The band was smoking! I’m not quite sure what they were smoking, but whatever it was, it was...

More Funny Goat Stories

I answer just about every email I get. Well, I don’t answer the nasty ones, and I can only remember one in the past few years…I started a newsletter with “Last week I met a bipolar bisexual. There might be a joke in there somewhere…” I...

More Goat Stories

I’m still getting emails about goats. It all started with a newsletter I wrote a few weeks back about how I met a woman at a dinner party who was disappointed that I didn’t actually own any goats. I told her that the photo I use in these newsletters...

Goat Story

Sometimes it’s hard to tell whether I’m joking or serious. So, from now on, when I’m serious, I’ll say something like…” Seriously.” If it’s a true story, I’ll start off with something like… “True story.” True story. I was at a wonderful party last month when a lovely...

You Never Know

  Last week I sang at Kirk Douglas’s house in Palm Springs, CA. They wanted me to sing Sinatra songs. I was told not to mention the gig, to keep it hush-hush. As a matter of fact, I didn’t even know where I was singing until the day of the show. When I found out,...

Frozen

Hey There Slimmest of All People, Before I start in with this week’s heart-freezing story, let me tell you about a few things… The Bona Fide song from the NPR Tiny Desk video contest is up on iTunes if you want to buy it. It’s expensive! 99 cents....